Operation Preparation

Throughout my time writing this blog I have taken you all with me through the highs and lows of my life since the age of 19. Most of these highs and lows have been reflections on love and loss (and my amazing time in Australia) however the next few blog posts are going to be on health. I am undergoing a tonsillectomy on April the 9th and so even if it may be very boring for you all to read I have decided I am going to document my surgery and my recovery process (mainly to give me something to focus on!) But also because I have read a few blog posts from adults who have under gone the same surgery and found it incredibly re-assuring and interesting. 

So, why am I having this tonsillectomy? Two reasons! I have suffered from bouts of tonsillitis since the age of 7 and it has come to the point now where my body is in a constant state of having tonsillitis. My tonsils are so inflamed and massive that I can't swallow food very easily, and I haven't felt "well" in a good few months. I am constantly tired, I nap a lot, and at first I thought this was me just being a student, but when I realised not many people were having as many naps as me I got concerned, and was then informed that due to my body constantly fighting infection it is totally normal for me to sleep a lot. I have also put on weight around my neck and face and this is due to the size of my tonsils and my glands being swollen & okay maybe some of it is due to the copious amount of pasta I consume also... 

The second reason is because of my tonsil size I have very little breathing gap space in my throat. This causes me at night to suffer from sleep apnoea. This only began about a year and a half ago, and at first it was flippin scary! Waking up in the night gasping for breath and making these awful sounds, I'm surprised the first time it happened I didn't ring 999 straight away! (I rang my mum instead) This also explains why I am tired most of the time as I haven't had a full nights sleep in nearly 2 years. All in all, it's been pretty rubbish and negative but at least now it is getting sorted! 

Preparing for the operation itself its quite daunting; I know some people reading this will think I am just being dramatic "its only having your tonsils out" but there is a lot of evidence that tonsillectomy in adults (which yes I count as now argh!) is incredibly painful and takes a while to recover from. I also do not like the fact that someone is "putting me to sleep"  (however I have been told when I wake up it will feel like the best sleep I've ever had) The thing I am most concerned about is my singing voice; I have been trained since I was 13 to sing with these huge tonsils in my mouth and now I am all of a sudden going to have all this new space to play around with. My singing coach has remained positive and although I will have to re-train my voice a little it should all in all improve the quality and tone of my voice in the long run. 

At the end of 2015 at church we had a service of "looking forward to 2016" with times of testimony from anyone who wanted to contribute. I spoke on the beautiful hymn "Abide with me" 

1. I fear no foe, with Thee at hand to bless;
   Ills have no weight, and tears no bitterness;
   Where is death’s sting? Where, grave, thy victory?
   I triumph still, if Thou abide with me.

                                                                                                                               

I love the line where it says "Ills have no weight and tears no bitterness" Of course when we go through health problems they can feel like they take over our lives and our families lives, but again as always I am a strong believer in every thing (yes, even health concerns) happening for a reason - and I am not yet sure why I have been through a year and a bit of feeling so rough but I am hoping that one day that will come to light. I have been trying to focus on other things but ever since I found out the date of my operation very little else has been pre-occupying my mind, and I am having to be careful in a way to not become selfish and make everything about me as I know there are many other problems in people's lives and the world.  I guess this is why this blog is so good - I have every right to write about me because its all my confessions! 

So here we go, 4 days to go till peace & quiet for my family and a whole lot of lessons in patience and dealing with pain for me... 

Until the recovery journey!